Each week we have been applying the Enneagram types to characters in the Bible and what we can learn from each of them about us and our relationships. So far we have learned about FIVE: The Investigator or Observer with the Magi, Thomas, and Nicodemus. EIGHT: The Challenger or Leader with John the Baptist and Samson. ONE: The Perfectionist with the Apostle Paul. And last week it was TWO: The Helper with Mary and Martha.
Now it is the time of the THREE. Enneagram Type THREES are commonly known as “The Performer” or “The Achiever.” Threes are driven and success-oriented, or at least to appear successful. Threes aim to impress others with their skills, their knowledge, and their accomplishments. Sometimes to the point of caring more about how you appear to others than you should.
Richard Rohr says no character in the Bible embodies any Enneagram number more completely than this week’s biblical character embodies a Three. Who is this heel grabber? Find out this week and that maybe you are a THREE too.
DYK?
Enneagram Type THREES are commonly known as “The Performer” or “The Achiever.” THREES are driven and success-oriented, or at least to appear successful. THREES aim to impress others with their skills, their knowledge, and their accomplishments. Sometimes to the point of caring more about how you appear to others than you should. THREES are image-conscious. They have an uncanny ability to appear successful and important, regardless of the crowd. They tend to forget their identity around their successes.
PJ Point
But you’re faithful and focused—a lot like Moses. Although he cared too much about how he looked to others (see Numbers 20:8-13 but he ultimately obeyed the Lord and led his people well.
Moses took the staff from the LORD’s presence, as the LORD had commanded him. Moses and Aaron gathered the assembly before the rock. He said to them, “Listen, you rebels! Should we produce water from the rock for you?” Then Moses raised his hand and struck the rock with his staff twice. Out flooded water so that the community and their animals could drink. The LORD said to Moses and Aaron, “Because you didn’t trust me to show my holiness before the Israelites, you will not bring this assembly into the land that I am giving them.”
Numbers 20:9-12
DYK?
The gift of THREES is truthfulness and authenticity. THREES have really good BS-detectors. They can see through the charades of others because they are so accustomed to the games people play.
Healthy THREES value honesty in their relationships and with themselves. They can give you an honest assessment of the world as they see it, and they can tell you how to make things better. Streamlining, productivity and efficiency are second nature to THREES.
DYK?
THREES get stuff done. And like all types, their wing determines how they do that.
A THREE with a TWO wing is the Star. They are warmer, more encouraging, sociable, popular, enjoy being the center of attention and seductive.
A THREE with a FOUR wing is the Professional. They are more focused on work, success, and introspection. They are more sensitive, artistic, imaginative and pretentious.
DYK?
With either wing though the THREE is in the heart triad. I talked a little about this last week and there is an insert explaining the different Gut, Heart and Head Triads. Within the Enneagram are “centers” or “triads” of three types that share similar underlying motivations, feelings, strengths, and blind spots.
For instance, the heart center is made up of types 2, 3, and 4. They are unified in a natural, subconscious shame that tends to impact them in different ways. They all want to feel affirmed and appreciated by other people, whether they are aware of it or not. When they’re healthy, heart types can be caring, authentic, and connected with others. However, they may express shame in negative ways when they don’t take the time to properly work through it.
Come and see what God has done:he is awesome in his deeds among mortals.
Psalms 66:5
Yes, the LORD has done great things for us,and we are overjoyed.
Psalms 126:3
PJ POINT
Richard Rohr says no character in the Bible embodies any Enneagram number more completely than this biblical character. He is called the heel grabber. Who is it? ( not going to tell you)..write the answer in the notes 🙂
DYK?
Jacob embodies a THREE. You remember his story, right? Jacob’s story is recorded in the middle part of Genesis. Jacob and his brother Esau were the fraternal twin sons of Isaac and Rebekah, the grandsons of Abraham and Sarah.
Even from the womb, Jacob was a deceiver. He fights with his brother, Esau, in the womb. And at their birth, Jacob’s limb stuck out first, but his brother was actually the firstborn. Jacob came second, grasping the heel of Esau. Jacob’s name literally means “heel grabber” or “deceiver.”
Isaac prayed to the LORD for his wife, since she was unable to have children. The LORD was moved by his prayer, and his wife Rebekah became pregnant. But the boys pushed against each other inside of her, and she said, “If this is what it’s like, why did it happen to me?”So she went to ask the LORD. And the LORD said to her,“Two nations are in your womb;two different peoples will emerge from your body.One people will be stronger than the other;the older will serve the younger.” When she reached the end of her pregnancy, she discovered that she had twins. The first came out red all over, clothed with hair, and she named him Esau. Immediately afterward, his brother came out gripping Esau’s heel, and she named him Jacob. Isaac was 60 years old when they were born.
Genesis 25:21-26
PJ POINT
Jacob would eventually go on to trick his older brother out of his birthright and his blessing. He devises a plan with his mom Rebekah to steal the birthright as his father lays on death’s door. Jacob pretends to be Esau, and receives his father’s blessing. Jacob’s early days represent the unhealthiest side of THREES – success at any cost.
Rebekah said to her son Jacob, “I just heard your father saying to your brother Esau, ‘Bring me some game and make me some delicious food so I can eat, and I will bless you in the LORD’s presence before I die.’ Now, my son, listen to me, to what I’m telling you to do. Go to the flock and get me two healthy young goats so I can prepare them as the delicious food your father loves. You can bring it to your father, he will eat, and then he will bless you before he dies.”
15 Rebekah took her older son Esau’s favorite clothes that were in the house with her, and she put them on her younger son Jacob. On his arms and smooth neck she put the hide of young goats, and the delicious food and the bread she had made she put into her son’s hands. Jacob went to his father and said, “My father.”And he said, “I’m here. Who are you, my son?” Jacob said to his father, “I’m Esau your oldest son. I’ve made what you asked me to. Sit up and eat some of the game so you can bless me.”
Genesis 27:6-10, 15-19
DYK?
We all have a vice, a deadly sin. And that is why the vice of THREE is deceit. THREE are expert “mask-wearers.” Threes can become whoever they need to be in any given situation in order to fit in or to make others think highly of them. The danger for THREE is that they can become social chameleons to the point that they lose their own identity, deceiving others to the degree that they end up believing their own false persona. Self-deceit is the true vice of THREE.
DYK?
Unhealthy THREES can be ultra-competitive. They divide the world into winners and losers, and they definitely wouldn’t be caught dead among the “losers.” Failure is not an option. For unhealthy THREES like Jacob, the ends absolutely justify the means in achieving success and being known as the best.
Unhealthy THREES are not in tune with their emotions at all. They have the ability to compartmentalize their lives in such a way that negative emotions don’t necessarily have any bearing their ability to perform.
PJ POINT
But this can also mean that THREEs try to avoid conflict, especially in times of stress. And when THREEs are under stress they will start to show some of the average or unhealthy characteristics of a NINE. They become disengaged, apathetic and go on autopilot. They lose their focus and drive, they involve themselves with busywork to give the appearance of accomplishment.
And feeling little energy and passion, they want to be left alone and given their space. A perfect example of this is that when Esau hears he has lost his blessing he is furious. Rather than confront Esau and own up to his actions, Jacob runs.
PJ POINT
While on the run, Jacob receives a vision from God that includes a ladder with angels ascending and descending from heaven. Ascent and descent, climbing up and down ladders. THREES relate to these ideas well. Even at his lowest, God reassured Jacob that he was with him, that he was watching over him, that he was loved and pursued. I think this is a message that most THREES need to hear.
He reached a certain place and spent the night there. When the sun had set, he took one of the stones at that place and put it near his head. Then he lay down there. He dreamed and saw a raised staircase, its foundation on earth and its top touching the sky, and God’s messengers were ascending and descending on it. Suddenly the LORD was standing on it and saying, “I am the LORD, the God of your father Abraham and the God of Isaac. I will give you and your descendants the land on which you are lying.
Genesis 28:11-13
PJ POINT
Then Jacob then went to work for his Uncle Laban in Genesis 29. While working there, Laban gave Jacob a taste of his own medicine by deceiving him into marrying Leah AND Rachel. But during this time, it seems as if Jacob turns a corner. He no longer tries to win at all costs. He works hard for what he wants, knowing that his efforts will pay off in the end if he’s patient enough to follow through.
While working for Laban, Jacob gains wives and sons and a lot of wealth. But he also learns patience and humility. THREEs grow through struggle and challenge. If things come too easy to THREEs, then they stay stuck in their unhealthy patterns of vanity, deception, and a win-at-all-costs mentality.
PJ POINT
The ultimate challenge for Jacob came when he made the decision to go home and confront his past – possibly one of the hardest things for a THREE to do. While Jacob was making his way back home, he had an encounter with God that would leave him crippled in Genesis 32. Jacob wrestled with God all night, showing his dedication to the struggle and his unwillingness to give up when things got hard – true growth for a THREE.
And when they are moving in the direction of growth and security, THREES will show the healthy side of SIX, the Loyalist. They become more cooperative more others-focused, more dedicated, more loyal, more in touch with their own emotions and those of others.
And when they become aware of their feelings and reveal who they really are behind the “achieving” masks they become more vulnerable. In refusing to give up when things got hard, Jacob showed real maturity and transformation.
But Jacob stayed apart by himself, and a man wrestled with him until dawn broke. When the man saw that he couldn’t defeat Jacob, he grabbed Jacob’s thigh and tore a muscle in Jacob’s thigh as he wrestled with him. The man said, “Let me go because the dawn is breaking.”But Jacob said, “I won’t let you go until you bless me.” He said to Jacob, “What’s your name?” and he said, “Jacob.” Then he said, “Your name won’t be Jacob any longer, but Israel, because you struggled with God and with men and won.”
Genesis 32:24-28
PJ POINT
But he also failed. Jacob didn’t win in his wrestling match but sometimes, the best thing that can happen to a THREE is a failure. We all learn far more from our failures than we do from our successes.
THREEs want to avoid failure at all costs, but it’s the very thing that can lead to growth and transformation. In this case, because of his struggle, he would no longer be called Jacob but instead Israel because you have struggled with God and with men and have overcome.
PJ POINT
When Jacob finally did confront Esau, things were not nearly as bad as he had imagined. He had feared for the worst – that Esau would still hold his deceptions against him and would seek revenge for all that Jacob had taken from him. Much to Jacob’s surprise, he was greeted with the open arms of forgiveness.
This can completely rock a THREES world. THREES, especially unhealthy Threes, have a hard time believing that they are worthy of love and acceptance. They know their own deceitfulness and vanity. They know their own faults that they are trying to hide from the rest of the world. When those faults, failures, shortcomings, and sins are laid bare for all the world to see, and they are still forgiven and loved anyway, that is almost more than a THREE can bear.
Esau said, “What’s the meaning of this entire group of animals that I met?”Jacob said, “To ask for my master’s kindness.” Esau said, “I already have plenty, my brother. Keep what’s yours.” Jacob said, “No, please, do me the kindness of accepting my gift. Seeing your face is like seeing God’s face, since you’ve accepted me so warmly. Take this present that I’ve brought because God has been generous to me, and I have everything I need.” So Jacob persuaded him, and he took it.
Genesis 33:8-11
PJ POINT
Once though THREES turn a corner in their lives they are no longer driven by success, vanity, and appearances, but rather by truthfulness, authenticity, and acceptance. This can take a lifetime for a Three to learn, and it only comes through the very thing THREES avoid the most – failure.
And that is their core fear: being worthless, a failure, incapable, unimpressive, unsuccessful and inefficient. worthless.
If you are a THREE you must stop fearing failure. You must stop believing the lies: “I am what I do; I am what I have, and I am what others say I am.” You are a child of God. You are loved, accepted, and pursued by God. Even if your worst and darkest part of yourself is fully known, you can also experience love and grace and forgiveness.
PJ POINT
THREEs strive for success and rely on validation from others to assess their value. They constantly create goals to track their achievements and impress others. Their core fear is failing to win the admiration of others and ultimately being considered worthless.
But we can all relate to God as “The First Mover.” God has done the work of salvation for us. This also reassures me that there’s nothing I can do to make God love me any more or any less. I don’t have to work for God’s acceptance. I don’t have to “succeed” in order to earn God’s favor.
The Biblical reminder for Type 3s’s is that your value does not come from serving man but serving God only heard in Colossians 3:23 “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters”
PJ Final Point
We all need to hear God’s invitation for you and all of us today which is I invite you to be free from the need to succeed in order to establish your worth in the world.
THREEs You are of great value regardless of your accomplishments. Are you are a THREE? If not what is your number?
